I spent nights writing you,
Not longhand but in the notes section of my phone.
Because I can’t bring myself
to tell you how much I miss
You. How you weren’t just a lover
But my best friend.
I still feel your lips lingering on my neck,
mostly at night.
That’s when you visit me.
Now I’ve taken to sleeping during the day
so I never miss you –
at night.
How can I feel so small,
in one of the biggest cities?
The city that suffers from overpopulation.
Yet somehow,
I always find myself alone.
Not exactly without you but instead
with phantom you.
Every song, every painting, every book
You keep coming back.
You were like a daydream
Now it’s left me wondering if you were even real at all.
I promised myself I wasn’t a half
But
Without you,
I don’t feel whole.
Brittany DeLuca is a NYC based poet who can be found in the darkest corner of a cafe. She writes about imaginary lovers and sometimes puts a twist of truth in there.